Grilled Pear And Cream

I'm never buying pears in a package again because I eat them at a rate of 0.25/day, and the rate decreases when the pears start to soften. I like Bartlett/Williams (both names work), but only if they're light green and hard. Once they start to get watery and mushy (a.k.a more and more like a Chinese pear), I lose interest.

What to do with softened pears?! Again, my pancake maker delicious-fies food. It's like a function. Stick in input. Pancake maker evaluates it. Delicious output.

let pancake_maker (food: 'a) : betterfood =
 Somemagic.heat food

(for Ocaml).

Anyway, I grilled a pear, sloshed some Half & Half on it, and poured in a lot of cereal. Yay! Creamy dessert!

Candy Reviews

New candy samples to review! This begs the question of whether I should review candy that I've already tried in the past or not (because that brings up a ton (literally) of candy to review)...

Necco Mint Julep

This smelled like 100% toothpaste. It tasted nothing of the sort, though! It was very chewy and juicy (I know, strange diction, but it's the best adjective for it), and didn't have too strong a mint taste, so by the time I had finished consuming it, my mouth wasn't minty at all. I am most pleased with the juiciness.

Necco Banana Split

This one did not have any smells. It also only tasted mildly of banana, but at least it wasn't such an artificial banana flavour. Again, extremely juicy.

Goetze's Original Caramel Cream

Before I divulge into the ingredient/advertising aspect, I'd like to say that this tasted half amazing! The cream part tasted... cold (surprising), but wasn't so special. The caramel part, however, tasted like bread. It was textured nothing like bread, being super gooey and chewy, but it tasted just like bread! It was that not-sweet-blandy-breaddy-wholesome taste, so I enjoyed that very much. However, what gets to me is that Goetze's advertises itself as all original and using ingredients from way back when, and being healthyish for candy. Now, I'm pretty sure 60 or 70 years ago, HFCS and PHO were not used in candy! How is this "Original"? However, the ingredient "wheat flour" probably explains the delicious bready taste.

Goetze's Chocolate Caramel Cream

So, the chocolate flavour wasn't as great as the caramel one, since it was just a milder/maltier chocolate version of the bread-caramel flavoured one. I'm not sure whether I'm ever going to buy these again, because of the ingredients (a matter of principle, I guess), but I'm pretty sure I can emulate something like this in my kitchen...when I get home.

Brach's Jelly Nougat

The jelly was such a disappointment; you couldn't distinguish it from the nougat and it was basically hard chopped up jelly bean. The nougat was also sort of a disappointment because it tasted much too sweet, and not milky enough.

Brach's Neapolitan Coconut Sundae

Chewy, with a distinct not-really-coconut flavour. No chocolate/vanilla/straberry flavours, though :(

Pirate Brand Puffs

Since I, like all other first-year students, was conned into buying a meal plan and dining dollars [okay, I've never understood why people want a meal plan with "all dining dollars". That's what PennCash is for! But for printing and buying non-food items too!], I decided I might as well spend my dining dollars on food that I can review...so I bought all five flavours of Pirate brand puffs and figured it'd be great to review them all. Judging by the first flavour I've ever tried, the white cheddar one, I had excheesingly high expectations.

I was wrong. I forgot to take a picture of the Barbecue flavoured one, so that's why it's pictured above. I would like to say that it does give a rather sweet barbecue aftertaste, and it is rather tangy, but the seasoning is erratically mixed into the puffs. There were some puffs that were absolutely bland, wheras others were 200% seasoning [which was nice. The whole package should just have a ton more seasoning dumped in!]. There was a nice umami taste, even though the sweet taste was more prevalent.

I also forgot to take a picture of the sour cream and onion flavour, but no matter; it was a boring one anyway.

Veggie. Tastes like super-mild kelp. Super-mild. No hint of parsley, even though it was stated on the package. No hint of anything, whatsoever. Have you ever wondered what a corn puff tastes like without salt and flavouring? Well, you have it right here. I know it looks really pretty and earthy, but I guarantee it tastes bland.

Okay, this one tastes a bit more flavourful than the Veggie one; there IS a hint of onion, but if you're expecting something like the Frito-Lay sour cream and onion-ness, you will be highly disappointed. Again, this is a rather bland flavour and actually tastes kind of sweet rather than savoury.

Now THIS! is the best flavour, by far. It is extremely cheese-flavoured, melts in your mouth [literally], sticks to your teeth with cheesiness, and crunches satisfyingly between your teeth. They are all rod-shaped. They are salty [but not too salty], tangy, and will most likely not make you smart.

This was another disappointment, because I was expecting something like Calbee's pizza flavoured potato chip that is so popular in Hong Kong. This flavour...was a tad sour ["tomato"], a tad sweet [?!], and a tad bland. There was nothing that made it taste like pizza. It was just a crunchy puff with a sweet aftertaste. There was nothing pizza-y: no cheese, no vegetable chunks, no dough, no crusty parts, no mushrooms... nothing.

This is the second best flavour, since the seasoning actually is spread out well, and there are no bland pieces. This is distinct from the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour because it is more sour and tangy, and it's softer in texture and more soluble [yes. More soluble.]. Therefore, it sounds quieter when you, with your saliva encrusted teeth, chew on it. I imagine myself chewing those styrofoam packing peanuts when I eat these, whereas the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour reminds me more of chewing sponge toffee. Fortunately and unfortunately, respectively, I have not done those tasks. So, depending on the texture/tangyness, take your pick. I decided to use the word "respectively" because I wrote a lab report and included it a few times. I haven't been updating much because I've been really busy with schoolwork. I have another exam on Wednesday!

In summary: buy the White Cheddar flavour and the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour, because, well, they actually have a FLAVOUR. Try out the Barbecue if you're in for some sweet, albeit, unevenly-distributed seasoning. Ignore the other 3 flavours because they are just a marketing gimmick [like my meal plan!].

What?! Cheesecake?!

Yes! Cheesecake! With tofu! The recipe is at the bottom of this post! [I haven't posted a recipe in a LONG time... a whole semester, right?]

I had a problem. I wanted to make cheesecake because BV likes cheesecake. However, I have never used sour cream or heavy cream or whipped cream or dairy products like that in my cooking before, so... I felt scared using them. Okay, I've used whipped cream before, but that was at least 5 or 6 years ago, and that was whipped cream used as... whipped cream.

On the other hand, I squeezed a piece of tofu. [haha. weak joke...]...I mean, on the other hand, I know very well how tofu works. I can make food with tofu.

BV hates tofu but I used it anyway...

The first cheesecake turned out tasting like tofu, because I had used approximately 20 ounces of tofu in it... along with some cranberry juice, because, why not? I also threw in some corn starch to keep it from falling apart, although I'm not sure whether it's necessary.

It looks like cheesecake, right?

Or, it looks like stained bacteria cultures...

I personally like frozen cheesecake, and I think this is due to the fact that the first few times we bought cheesecake in HK [33HKD for a plain Sara Lee cheesecake - that's what I remember], we never followed the "leave cheesecake at room temperature for 20 minutes before eating" instruction. Honestly, frozen cheesecake, with the hard, ice-blockish texture, tastes better than creamy, room temperature cheesecake.

I used Grape-Nuts for the crust, because ever since I found out that every graham cracker at Shoprite has PHO, I've decided to dislike them [yes, I'm biased!! But so are you!]. Maybe Trader Joe's has nicer graham crackers?

I've also decided to dislike Keebler because everything they make [that I know of] is grossly full of HFCS and/or PHO.

So, in my second batch, I gave some leftover batter to my sister who ended up decorating them with candy and sprinkles. It is utterly overkill.

This is the cheesecake I gave BV. I probably shouldn't've told him that there was tofu in it... but I guess he couldn't taste it [except for the "weird texture"] because he didn't say that it tasted tofu-y.

This is the 3rd cheesecake [from the second batch] that I gave to JM, and I decorated it using the leftover icing sugar from the cookies.

Recipe for cheesecake!!!!

Filling:

1. 8 oz cream cheese, cut into chunks [one package. GET FULL-FAT. DON'T GET LOW FAT!!! This isn't because full-fat cream cheese is healthy or anything; it's just because I'm not sure how fat-free cream cheese melts/reacts with my other ingredients...so I suppose you could get fat-free cream cheese if you want.]

2. 10 oz squeezed firm tofu [or 20 oz if you want the tofu taste to be prevalent. By "squeezed", I mean, try get rid of as much of the water as possible. I did this by literally squeezing the tofu, which incidentally mashed the tofu so it was easier to blend.]

3. Blueberry, or 2 tbsp cocoa powder, or whatever flavouring.

4. At least half a cup of orange juice. [Or lemon juice. An acidic juice. The orange juice actually left a tiny bit of orangey taste... although that could've just been my imagination]

5. Around 4 tsp of corn starch [add more if you feel like it. I'm not quite sure how much I had, since I initially had 2 tsp, then during the blending, I added more.

6. 1 cup of confectioner's sugar! [YES!! More if you feel like it.]

Healthy Crust!

1. 2 cups of Grape-Nuts

2. Honey or sugar water [However much you want; if you want a crunchy-tooth-breaking crust, don't use that much water, but if you want a soft crust, add more water until it looks damp!]

Stuff to do!

1. Pulse and shake cereal and sugar/honey/water mixture until you get fine pieces.

2. Press into a 11-inch pan if you want the crust to just fill the bottom. Alternatively, press into a 9-inch pan if you want crust on the sides. I used a 7.5-inch pan and had a lot of crust leftover [hence the mini cheesecakes that my sister studded with sprinkles...]

3. Bake at 350F for 5 minutes. You do NOT need to preheat your oven. That is a waste of heat.

4. Stick everything in the Filling list in a blender, and blend! After a few minutes on Low, you should have something that is uniformly blended and has the consistency of American pudding. If not, make it more pudding-ish, by adding corn starch and/or orange juice. I know "consistency of American pudding" is really hard to define, but it shouldn't be like cookie dough. It also shouldn't be like cake batter. It's more... elegant and poofy than those. Actually, it's sort of gelatinous.

5. Taste it. If it tastes good, cool. If it doesn't taste sour enough, add more orange juice!

6. Pour onto crust and smooth it out.

7. Stick that cheesecake into the oven at 350F for 25 minutes. Leave it in there for another 25 minutes; why not? Use up the remaining heat!!

8. In the meantime, eat the cheesecake filling remaining in the blender. No eggs! No 90% fat! Yay!

9. Take cheesecake out, and let it cool. There really shouldn't be any browning...a tiny bit on the edges is okay, though.

10. When cheesecake is COLD COLD COLD, put it in the fridge/freezer/outside - whatever you prefer.

11. In 12 hours, take out the cheesecake and wipe off the condensation at the top, using a paper towel. Do not use a tissue. I'm not sure why the cheesecakes condensed... I think it's due to the tofu, actually, or perhaps the blueberries [high water content!]. Either way, although it makes the cheesecakes look a bit weird, it's just water after all.

12. These cheesecakes taste good for at least 3-4 days. In the freezer, they last much longer [well...duh.]

13. The cheesecake is actually relatively healthy...

Homecoming 30 October 2010

Those buns were advertised as warm. They were not warm, due to the wind. It was quite amusing. They also were super sticky [honey!], but too airy and uniform.

I know that this is a week late, but I've been really busy with studying, visiting BV, and doing homework, and somehow getting in 5-6 hours of sleep in per night. It's finally Friday, and although I do have a lot of homework to do, I'm going to update because this event I went to last Saturday was pretty amazing.

This was the Weiss Pavilion opening ceremony, and there were a lot of alumni there to see it since it was homecoming weekend. One day, I will protest the toast throwing tradition thingy...

The only reason I went was so that I could get a drawstring bag. The first 100 people, apparently, got drawstring bags. I also got a mint tin with mints and the Penn logo, which is pretty sick!!

There was also a lot of food. It was ridiculous. I have to say that the chocolate filled and sweet potato filled croissants were the best. The baked goods were cold, due to the freezing, windy weather, but they all tasted delicious and textured nevertheless.

They actually looked like savoury croissants, and I did want something savoury since everything else was loaded with sweetness. I did eat some quiche, before I realised there were cured pig chunks inside [ham].

This was a greek yoghurt, fruit and granola parfait. The blueberries and strawberries were used for the Penn colours, according to a girl I met at the opening. It was pretty awkward actually; at first, we just looked at each other, unsure of whether to talk or not. So then I said hi. And then we had a conversation, so that was interesting. I forgot her name though... oh well. I'll probably see her again, as I have with a bunch of other people who I thought I'd forgotten/they'd forgotten me.

I dislike hot apple cider. The fact that it's warm and sour kind of disgusts me. Cold apple cider, or frozen apple cider, on the other hand, is amazing. Note the cheerleaders in the glass. I should get better at photography.

This was a French toast chunk supersaturated with maple syrup. The whipped cream was amazingly fluffy and fat. It was literally a LOT of sugar...Maybe if I tried hard enough, I could've heard sugar crystals crunching...

Today! - Fall Fest

I'm finally updating about something that happened today. I still have heaps to write about concerning the past two weeks, but for today, I will blabber on about the blubber today. And yes, that is the line for Coup de Taco about an hour and a half into Fall fest.

Fall fest is overrated. I'm not kidding. Sure, you get free stuff, but the cool stuff actually costs money. The first 750-1000 people get a taco and cupcake for free, but that's if you stand in line.

For at least half an hour.

With a wristband, that you had to stand in line to obtain, as well.

Luckily, I had gone to the library from 12-2, so I was basically right inside the door [outside the door? I wasn't "outside" the door, though, since Fall fest was OUTSIDE the library. Anyway. I was right next to Fall fest], so I went, stood in line for a few minutes, realised I needed a wrist band, then went allllllll the way to the LOVE statue to get a wrist band, and jumped back in line. By this time, the line for Coup de Taco had doubled, although it wasn't as bad as it was 10 minutes later, where it had quadrupled. Oh exponential equations...

[Indoor photography pales - I mean, yellows - in comparison to sunlight photography]

I'm not actually sure why I bothered to stand in line for half an hour [ish?]. I do have a meal plan that guarantees that I get food and don't starve. I also have many kilos of adipose tissue that can sustain me for a while. However, I suppose it was just the fact that I didn't want to outline more for Comparative Med. Anyway, halfway through, two guys who were behind me in line were contemplating getting out of line, and then I told them that they didn't have wristbands... and I asked if they wanted mine. They said no, and went to get wristbands, and came back. Later, two girls [their friends?] dropped by, and they decided to beat the system by just cutting to the front. This meant they cut off ... at least thirty of us. Okay, maybe twenty. Which is still plenty [that wasn't meant to rhyme]. Pretty douche-bag thing to do, in my opinion, especially as there were another zillion people standing behind us [quadrupled, remember?] waiting patiently. The guys behind me, however, said "oh, we got honour... we're not going to cut", which is nice to know.

Anyway. I finally got a vegetarian taco.

Then I went to get a cupcake from Call Me Cupcakes, which was extremely fast since all the dude had to do was hand out a cupcake. No toasting or cooking needed.

I'll review the cupcake first because it sucked.

It's just a generic, bland, un-moist, unflavourful, NONchocolately, dry, small-air-holes, cupcake-shaped cupcake. It did not taste chocolatey, which is always an issue for me, especially when something is labelled CHOCOLATE. I tried to be unbiased about the icing. It was too fatty and oily for my liking. It was also quite tasteless [no chocolatey flavour, at all. It was just chocolate coloured]. Oh, it's pretty alright, but most cupcakes these days ARE pretty.

The taco, however, was quite amazing. It was crunchy, due to sliced tortilla chips INSIDE the taco!! The outer shell was a soft flour tortilla. I'm actually confused as to the difference between a burrito and a taco. Apart from the fact that the taco is open, I can't really see a difference. I guess it's like asking what's the difference between a sandwich and an open-top sandwich. Anyway, about the tortilla strips - I was amazed at this piece of ingenuity. It actually reminds me of the time I had a tortilla chip sandwich. It was amazing, too, although this surely beats it. The Cuban rice and beans were full of chunky flavour; the salsa companion was spicy, but not overwhelming. The cheesy-sour-creamy-cilantro thingy was actually pretty good, because I couldn't really taste the cilantro [I don't particularly like cilantro, so it's a plus for me, but maybe a minus for other people].

I also got an apple from the Penn Environmental Group, although it was just a generic fat GMO apple. The International Students Association [I think that was the group name?] gave out some candy and stuff too, so that was cool. Apart from that, I ended up falling asleep at the library again.

[Note the boxes of cupcakes at the back of the truck. I could've totally taken a box of them.]

I did, however, have a delicious Greek salad with a lot of creamy feta cheese this evening, which reminded me of AK. I miss her.

This Is Unfair.

College life is taking over so I don't actually have time to blog or enjoy food anymore. I don't actually spend more than half an hour eating food. In other words, I don't actually eat slow anymore. Now... it's just PRESSED FOR TIME. I don't even think I finished blogging about NSO. I guess I'll do that now...

So, there was a toga party at the History Museum on the 6th. I didn't like it. The food was nice though, especially the crispbread thingy with bean dip. After the toga party, at which I walked around gloomily, I met some people from my dorm house and we went to two frat houses... it was such a experience. I'm not sure whether I like it, so the only way I'd describe it is as an "experience". This blog post is so dry. Like the cookie I ate today. I idiotically fell for the cookie trap [again! 4th time, I think!!] and tried the chocolate fudge cookie, that I have posted about, many times before, as being too dry and hard.

Mind lapse, I guess.

Plating. I see through plating. Those are just grapes. I don't actually think that I like plating.

A mound of whipped cream and a few strawberry slices with cakey crumbs.

Really oily vegetables. Eh.

I actually have a dilemma. Do I want to write for PennAppetit? Is that overkill, since I already have a blog? Maybe they should include my blog on their website. However, joining them means I get told what to do. Which isn't that cool since puns are probably not going to be accepted. I'm also in other clubs too...

It's on the table, like the orange and pear and apple in my room. :)

Maybe I'll take photos for them.