Pirate's Booty - Chocolate

So. Chocolate flavoured puffed corn/rice...melts in your mouth, but in the characteristic soggy way particular to puffed corn snacks. The texture is quite intriguing.

The taste? Bizarre. Slightly salty, yet smothered in slightly bitter, powdery cocoa powder. Not sweet. Not entirely remarkable. No corn flavour either (predominately unsweetened rice puff; although I don't mind it, I think some people will unearth descriptions that include the word "cardboard")...it's rather bland.

Pirate Brand Puffs

Since I, like all other first-year students, was conned into buying a meal plan and dining dollars [okay, I've never understood why people want a meal plan with "all dining dollars". That's what PennCash is for! But for printing and buying non-food items too!], I decided I might as well spend my dining dollars on food that I can review...so I bought all five flavours of Pirate brand puffs and figured it'd be great to review them all. Judging by the first flavour I've ever tried, the white cheddar one, I had excheesingly high expectations.

I was wrong. I forgot to take a picture of the Barbecue flavoured one, so that's why it's pictured above. I would like to say that it does give a rather sweet barbecue aftertaste, and it is rather tangy, but the seasoning is erratically mixed into the puffs. There were some puffs that were absolutely bland, wheras others were 200% seasoning [which was nice. The whole package should just have a ton more seasoning dumped in!]. There was a nice umami taste, even though the sweet taste was more prevalent.

I also forgot to take a picture of the sour cream and onion flavour, but no matter; it was a boring one anyway.

Veggie. Tastes like super-mild kelp. Super-mild. No hint of parsley, even though it was stated on the package. No hint of anything, whatsoever. Have you ever wondered what a corn puff tastes like without salt and flavouring? Well, you have it right here. I know it looks really pretty and earthy, but I guarantee it tastes bland.

Okay, this one tastes a bit more flavourful than the Veggie one; there IS a hint of onion, but if you're expecting something like the Frito-Lay sour cream and onion-ness, you will be highly disappointed. Again, this is a rather bland flavour and actually tastes kind of sweet rather than savoury.

Now THIS! is the best flavour, by far. It is extremely cheese-flavoured, melts in your mouth [literally], sticks to your teeth with cheesiness, and crunches satisfyingly between your teeth. They are all rod-shaped. They are salty [but not too salty], tangy, and will most likely not make you smart.

This was another disappointment, because I was expecting something like Calbee's pizza flavoured potato chip that is so popular in Hong Kong. This flavour...was a tad sour ["tomato"], a tad sweet [?!], and a tad bland. There was nothing that made it taste like pizza. It was just a crunchy puff with a sweet aftertaste. There was nothing pizza-y: no cheese, no vegetable chunks, no dough, no crusty parts, no mushrooms... nothing.

This is the second best flavour, since the seasoning actually is spread out well, and there are no bland pieces. This is distinct from the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour because it is more sour and tangy, and it's softer in texture and more soluble [yes. More soluble.]. Therefore, it sounds quieter when you, with your saliva encrusted teeth, chew on it. I imagine myself chewing those styrofoam packing peanuts when I eat these, whereas the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour reminds me more of chewing sponge toffee. Fortunately and unfortunately, respectively, I have not done those tasks. So, depending on the texture/tangyness, take your pick. I decided to use the word "respectively" because I wrote a lab report and included it a few times. I haven't been updating much because I've been really busy with schoolwork. I have another exam on Wednesday!

In summary: buy the White Cheddar flavour and the Wisconsin Cheddar flavour, because, well, they actually have a FLAVOUR. Try out the Barbecue if you're in for some sweet, albeit, unevenly-distributed seasoning. Ignore the other 3 flavours because they are just a marketing gimmick [like my meal plan!].

My first meal at Penn

I know that I should've updated this a LONG time ago [read: April] but I was so caught up in school and stuff... plus, the quality isn't great, due to the fact that I was using my camera phone, which does not have flash. On the other hand, my camera phone has served me really well, and is the most useful function on my phone. Honest. [I don't use text messaging]. So, for the Penn Preview Day, we all had lunch at the 1925 Commons place. I'm definitely going to be blogging about this cafeteria a LOT during the next... wow... four years [unless I get expelled or drop out or something...] so this post technically shouldn't be a big deal. It was a Friday, and the garlic bread/toast was really crunchy.

These are vegan wraps, filled with lettuce, tomato, onion, and tofu. The grilled tofu wasn't that great in my opinion, and the wrap itself was really dry. And bland. I suppose this is the cliche "diet" or "vegetarian" dish. It was sorta mediocre... I don't mind eating it, but its lack of flavour is rather disappointing.

The chocolate cookie was dry. I like chewy, soft cookies, so I can't really vouch for them... I suppose those who like dry, crispy cookies would like these, though. I also learned that I don't like pretzel Goldfish crackers. The tortilla chips, were very crunchy and aesthetically pleasing. I wonder if they actually make these from scratch?

Okay. The marshmallow and rice cereal square is amazing! As you have noticed...I ate at least three of them. [I actually ate more than that. This reminds me of a day two summers ago, when I ate at least 10 packets of Kellogg's Rice Krispie Treats. In one day. Yes, I was obsessed that one day. I've yet to do such a thing again...] They were soft and gooey, and NOT stale, even though they'd been sitting there for ages...[trust me, stale marshmallow squares, like the ones at Borders, are dry. And not sticky. And lack the marshmallow texture]. These ones were really moist and I could literally "sink" my teeth into them and have them stuck there perpetually... except that sugar is polar and my saliva is polar.

I don't think anyone knows what I'm talking about when I mention the pizza crust from the Pizza Hut pizza [mini, cut into 4 pieces] at Penrith Plaza in 1999, or 2000. However, if you consume the pizza crust at 1920 Commons... you get a nearly identical taste. And texture. And smell. Oh nostalgia...This would be the only reason I'm going to be consuming pizza at Penn. Well, the topping was nice, too :), but the crust was a reminder of childhood. Which is ironic, since I haven't had "American" Pizza Hut pizza, ever.